it has been suggested

i may have some bad habits.

 

for instance:

denial

the edges of chairs and desks

endless cigarettes

electricity

and fire

water for wine and

a constant rattle in the glass

throwing things

phobia

hypochondria

the place just behind the eyes

self-loathing

delusion

an angry independence

a wide-eyed awareness

lack of appetite

bruises

grudges

nail biting

perversion

procrastination

women

men

hands

curiosity and

simple dangers, like

driving too fast or too slow.

constantly conflicted

and always making lists.

 

i am everyone and no one,

the burden and the burdened.

a container full of

obsessive memories

and unstable ideas.

 

addicted to the

pressure.

 

addicted to

delicate things that

shatter easily and

heavy things that won’t break

 

and the way we talk about it

when we don’t talk about it.